I was at a lost for words again today. Life is slow right now. The snow has brought things to a stand still. I am doing things but nothing is pushing new ideas or interesting conversation so I looked back to the beginning. I scrolled and scrolled back to my first few posts. The following paragraphs are where I began this writing. At the time I was teaching, my mother was still with us, there was no grandson and my son was not married. I was relativity youthful. Life was very busy and my post were short. There was so much happening day to day there was always something to write about.
I had forgotten I had started with writing two posts a week. One on Mondays – for It’s Monday! What are you reading? and one for Slice of Life. ( In a search it appears now there are many people who have blogs under the title It’s Monday! What are you reading?. The one I followed seems to be mainly children’s books and what people were using in there classroom.)
Now 12 years later I feel far from that time period. I still read the occasional children’s book – mainly in seeking new books for Little Man. I am no longer reviewing them. I am not sure when that fell away. My reading is more adult focused or seeking new information. Wow, I have become a more non fiction reader. Interesting.
More interesting is to see where I was and what I choose to put words to in those early years of writing. Ok so interesting to me. Below are a short paragraphs I pulled from my first years of writing and a reflection of where I am now. There were more interesting posts but I picked March 1 at the date to pull things from.
March 1, 2012
In her hand was a tiny little brown frog. ” Where did it come from?” I wondered. “I was watering the plants in the book room. The big pots I brought in from my garden and he jumped into my hands.” The next thing she said is ” I can’t kill him”. So there we were late on a Wednesday night wondering what to do with a frog on the last day of February. Did it just hatch? Had it been living in her plants all school year? Is this the first sign of spring?
Now: funny how even as a teacher I was seeking signs of spring on the first of March! and yes he lived on in a large fish tank turned into swamp land.
March 1, 2013
While listening to a talk last night on the internet I heard the phrase – “the auspicious wonder that lies at the heart of making.” What a great thought!
The talk was about gift giving and the making of gifts. The speaker comes from the creative field and was talking about things that are made but the wonder lies in the space around the making and his thinking, the sharing and the passing of this gift on to others.
Now: I love this statement and glad I found it: the auspicious wonder that lies at the heart of making. It is still important to me – the making of things. I wish I knew who said this this. A bit of internet searching and I think it might be Frank Chimero – who published a book called The Shape of Design 2012). Interesting – I am now seeking a copy if it. (history pushing me forward)
March 1, 2014
As she read the poems she talked about the pictures she saw in her “head” as she was reading. She finally read a poem about a boy eating hot dogs. She asked “what picture does this make in your head? What did you visualize?” The response from several kids was “What picture? Can you show us the picture in the book?”
Now: this same conversation was shared between my daughter and I today as we both talked about helping Little Man towards books that are more text and less images. He wants the longer more complexed stories but he wants the pictures. So we are talking about what pictures are in your head?
March 1, 2015
The students go off to write, I get ready for the next math lesson, geography lesson, reading lesson, science lesson and the world spins forward. The story started as a model sits forgotten with all the other stories in my writers journal – that black and white Mead notebook.
Now: Those model stories started years ago are still in the Mead notebook. I moved on to gardens and painting. The writing of children’s stories left behind. Hmm? I wonder about those and if there is some life there that should be looked at again. Who am I as a writer? Am I to far from children to be writing those stories? Is painting more of where or who I am? Interesting to think about! I am not sure!
March 1, 2016
So I am working on remembering that time makes a difference. I am working on writing down little moments as they happen so I can come back to them on those slow days when I think – “WHY did I say I would do this again this year?!”
I am working on holding this excitement of sharing my writing with friends, of pushing myself to write daily, of remember that time does make a difference and we will all be amazed at the end of the month when we say – WE DID IT!
Now: Today was one of those days – WHY did I say I would do this again this year?! I know why. I value this push to write. I value this community of teachers and writers that commit themselves to their students and to developing their own writing skills. Is it hard? yes!
But we have five days and then we say WE DID IT!
I may be an old gardener and a new painter but writing is still important if only to keep this old brain moving forward.
Looking forward to writing for four more days even if I have no idea what I will write about!
Words from JL 