Riding the winds of 2020

I have been missing from this group for about a month. The wild winds of 2020 had taken their toll and so I had stepped back to plant my feet more stolidly in the ground. I stepped back to let go of boxed up emotions and to take stock of where I am at this time in history and in my life.

It all sounds so romantic to take stock, to reflect and release. I tell you it was not. The first of these weeks I just puttered my way through the days. I was reading here and there, playing once in awhile with my grandson and taking long walks, seeing a few friends from a safe distance. Not thinking too deeply.

Just as I was settling into the time of quiet my back moved into a massive muscle spasm that in fact was blood clots in my right lung. It took a couple trips to the doctor and the ER to discover this large hiccup in my life. New medication started and 24 hours in the hospital I discovered I do not have Covid nor have I had Covid. I discovered I have no blood clots in my legs which is where they usually travel from into places like your lungs.

And we are left with a puzzle. What caused this large hiccup in my life? What underlying condition has sent blood clots racing through my veins and into my lungs?  This will take some time to sort out but I am hoping for the best. I have been known for unexplained illnesses so that might be my best bet here. We will see in the weeks to come.

So in this time of reflection I am now recovering –  I can now walk around our block – 4 times a day.  (that is 4 eight minute walks). I am still napping twice a day and early to bed. My reading has slowed but hope to be back at it soon.

I am still riding the wind – at times cool and comfortable with time to reflect. At other times the winds are hot and turning like a tornado swirling around me and leaving me unsure, confused and worried as to where I will go from here.

Today is a day of light rain and cool breezes. I will take it for now. One day at a time.

Also happy to be clear headed enough to say hi and do a bit of writing. Also to share a few photos from the garden! The garden keeps going no matter what I am up to.

About Joanne Toft

I am a retired Minneapolis Public School teacher. I walk, garden, care for my Grandson and write. Life is good!
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3 Responses to Riding the winds of 2020

  1. Oh my! What a scare! I’m glad you found at least a partial answer and are getting better. And your flowers are beautiful.

  2. I love this line: “The wild winds of 2020 had taken their toll and so I had stepped back to plant my feet more stolidly in the ground.” And I love how you weave both that metaphor through the piece as well as literal meanings, writing of the weather and garden.

  3. Ramona says:

    Gorgeous glimpse of your garden and the blossoms! Hoping that they can solve this latest puzzle/hiccup in your life. Keep taking things slow and easy as you travel your road to recovery. Glad they ruled out Covid-19. Hoping you get answers soon.

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